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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/29299437">Apparently, Fish Can Climb Trees</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Batshit_Bogs/pseuds/Batshit_Bogs'>Batshit_Bogs</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Why Adopt Kids When You Can Adopt Merpeople [2]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Batman - All Media Types, DCU</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alternate Universe - Merpeople, Bruce Wayne is a Good Parent, Fluff, Jason tries to climb a tree, a tiny bit of both, just a little mer kid climbin a tree, just the slightest dash of angst, no beta we die like robins, or is it hurt/comfort?, this was a prompt I got on Tumblr</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-02-09</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-02-09</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-18 01:54:43</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>3,434</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/29299437</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Batshit_Bogs/pseuds/Batshit_Bogs</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>
  <i>It takes less than a week for Jason to decide that he wants to try climbing a tree.</i>
</p><p>  <i>Several more tree-climbing stories had been shared while Clark had been visiting, and it sounded like a fun activity. So what if Jason doesn’t have legs? It can’t be that hard. He just has to find the right tree.</i></p><p>-</p><p>Clark accidentally inspires Jason to try his hand at tree climbing. It goes about as well as you'd expect.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Jason Todd &amp; Bruce Wayne, Jason Todd &amp; Bruce Wayne &amp; Clark Kent</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Why Adopt Kids When You Can Adopt Merpeople [2]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1976269</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>26</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>268</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Apparently, Fish Can Climb Trees</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>This took longer to write than it should've, but unfortunately, I'm in a bit of a slump right now. The ideas are plentiful, and the motivation is barren. I am frustrated</p><p>@ <a href="https://www.tumblr.com/blog/view/theycallme-ook-v2">theycallme-ook</a> on Tumblr dunked this prompt in my inbox, special thanks to them uwu</p><p>Clark mentions he knows how to speak seal, and that's because he's a selkie! He can turn into a very large sea lion. That isn't really important here, but I thought I'd share that little tidbit</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“You’re getting really good at this.”</p><p> </p><p>Jason looks up from the book he’s reading aloud, and gives Clark a toothy grin. “You think so? I’m still having trouble with some of the longer words, the ones with...uh…”</p><p> </p><p>“Contractions?” Clark guesses.</p><p> </p><p>“No, no, the...s...the sss…” Jason snaps his fingers in Bruce’s direction as he thinks. “B, help me out here.”</p><p> </p><p>“Syllables,” Bruce says without looking up from his tablet.</p><p> </p><p>Jason points. “Yes, syllables! I’m having trouble with words that have more syllables.”</p><p> </p><p>“Well, that’s understandable,” Clark says. “I had trouble with them when I was learning English.”</p><p> </p><p>“I bet you did,” Bruce mutters under his breath.</p><p> </p><p>“You did?” Jason asks, ignoring him.</p><p> </p><p>Clark smiles. “Yep. I didn’t know any kind of language as a base outside of seal, though, so it’s to be expected.”</p><p> </p><p>“Right, you were found as a...a…”</p><p> </p><p>“Pup.”</p><p> </p><p>“Pup.” Jason huffs. “There are so many <em> words. </em> At this rate I don’t know how I’m gonna learn them all.”</p><p> </p><p>“Patience, Jay,” Bruce glances up with a soft smile. “You’re already doing incredibly.”</p><p> </p><p>Jason preens at the praise. He did pick up humanspeak - <em> English</em><em>,</em> really quickly. He’s only been speaking it for a year, and he’s already mostly fluent. Apparently Dick didn’t get to Jason’s current speaking level for three whole years. <em> Ha. </em> Jason eagerly looks back down at his book and continues sounding out words and stringing sentences together. After a moment, he frowns and tilts his head. </p><p> </p><p>“What is it, kiddo?” Clark asks.</p><p> </p><p>“What’s a...a…” Jason wrinkles his nose as he says, “oh-ache?”</p><p> </p><p>Clark leans forward to see the page better. Jason taps the confusing word with a claw.</p><p> </p><p>“Oh, you mean ‘oak’.”</p><p> </p><p>“Oak,” Jason repeats. He’s getting really annoyed with English pronunciations - there’s no pattern! It’s like someone rolled carves stones to pick what letters would sound like, and how the sounds vary. It’s completely random.</p><p> </p><p>“It’s a kind of tree.” Clark laughs and looks over at Bruce. “That reminds me of the huge oak in Ma’s backyard. The one that you -”</p><p> </p><p>“I know which one you’re talking about,” Bruce interrupts quickly.</p><p> </p><p>Smelling blood in the water, Jason leans further over the edge of the pool, grinning. “The one that you what, B?”</p><p> </p><p>“The one that he fell out of trying to get a kite for the neighbor,” Clark says, chuckling. “We were just kids, and Bruce thought he could impress everyone by climbing to the top.”</p><p> </p><p>Jason doesn’t know what a kite is, but the mental image of Bruce falling out of a tree is priceless, so he laughs anyway. Bruce grumbles something too quiet to hear as he pointedly keeps his eyes on his tablet.</p><p> </p><p>“Man, I never thought I’d see someone get <em> mad </em>when they break their arm.”</p><p> </p><p>“He broke his arm?” Jason gasps. </p><p> </p><p>“Yep. Wasn’t the first time, wouldn’t be the last.”</p><p> </p><p>“You’re the one to talk,” Bruce says. “I distinctly remember you telling Lois ‘watch this’ right before -”</p><p> </p><p>“In my defense,” Clark interrupts, blushing faintly, “I didn’t know the cows would be there.”</p><p> </p><p>“Mhm, sure.”</p><p> </p><p>Jason laughs again, and gets two smiles for it. He swishes his fluke along the soft sand lining the floor of the pool, considering their banter.</p><p> </p><p>“One time,” he says slowly, trying to find the right way to phrase the sentence in English, “I almost broke my arm wrestling a dolphin.”</p><p> </p><p>Clark gasps. “You <em> what?” </em></p><p> </p><p>“Not a big one! It was a - a, uh, small dolphin? A young one?”</p><p> </p><p>“A calf?” Bruce supplies. “A calf is a baby dolphin.”</p><p> </p><p>“Yeah, a calf.”</p><p> </p><p>Clark lets out a breath and ruffles Jason’s hair. “You had me worried for a second there.”</p><p> </p><p>“Like I would attack a grown dolphin - I’m not stupid.” Jason rolls his eyes. “But yeah, the calf kicked my ass anyway.”</p><p> </p><p>“Language,” Bruce says.</p><p> </p><p>“Oh, shut up, if you didn’t want me using human swears, then you shouldn’t teach them to me.”</p><p> </p><p>“I’ve only taught you a couple. Barbara, on the other hand -”</p><p> </p><p>“Is a bad influence, yeah, yeah, I know.” Jason waves a fin. “But she’s your boss, so you don’t get to say squat.”</p><p> </p><p>“Technically, I’m her boss -”</p><p> </p><p>“No, you’re not.” Jason sets the book down to swim over and pat Bruce on the shoulder. “It’s okay, B, you can keep saying that if it makes you feel better.”</p><p> </p><p>Bruce levels an unamused deadpan at him. Jason smiles sweetly before going back over to where his book is. The smile turns slightly mischievous as he notices how Clark is trying not to laugh. </p><p> </p><p>It always gets more entertaining when Clark is around - Bruce calls him an enabler.</p><p> </p><p>Jason thinks he should visit more often.</p><p> </p><p> </p>
<ul>
<li><b>⤘⤘⤘    -</b></li>
</ul><p> </p><p> </p><p>It takes less than a week for Jason to decide that he wants to try climbing a tree.</p><p> </p><p>Several more tree-climbing stories had been shared while Clark had been visiting, and it sounded like a fun activity. So what if Jason doesn’t have legs? It can’t be <em> that </em>hard. He just has to find the right tree.</p><p> </p><p>There aren’t that many trees near enough to the bay’s shoreline for Jason to safely get to. The closest ones would probably leave him stranded, and he isn’t too keen on drying out and baking in the sun.</p><p> </p><p>By a stroke of luck, Jason finds one while he’s scouting parts of the coast on the side of the bay across from the research center. The tree is leaning at a shallow angle, with cracked bark and sturdy looking branches that stretch over the water. It’s also just a few feet from the rocky shore. </p><p> </p><p>It’s perfect.</p><p> </p><p>Jason will shimmy up there, see what the fuss is about, and then go home. Maybe brag a little bit to Bruce. <em> ‘See, B, I don’t even have legs and I can climb trees better than you’ </em>, or something. </p><p> </p><p>The drop of the shore is steep, though the water comes level with the top. It makes it easy for Jason to slide out of the water. He checks his surroundings halfway through heaving himself onto dry land, and mentally reprimands himself for being careless.</p><p> </p><p>To the right, the tree. To the right, dirt and dense undergrowth. </p><p> </p><p>No humans or predators in sight. The coast is clear.</p><p> </p><p>Jason takes a page out of seals’ books and flops his way to the tree’s roots. The coarse dirt scrapes somewhat uncomfortably across his skin and softer scales, but it’s easily ignored. A couple of rocks and sticks won’t get through his thicker scales. The leafy canopy of the tree casts dappled shade over his body, preventing the filtered sun from getting too warm.</p><p> </p><p>Before long, Jason has his claws in the dry bark, and he grins. He’s starting to see how this could be fun. </p><p> </p><p>The lean of the tree makes it easy for him to pull himself up. There’s plenty of purchase for his claws, and it’s easy to right himself when he wobbles. Honestly, he doesn’t see how this could be difficult. Jason is doing this with just his arms - okay, and some wiggling like the videos he’s seen of snakes moving. </p><p> </p><p>Jason takes a break where the trunk splits off into branches. It creates a kind of bowl shape that’s perfect for resting in. He sighs as he slides into it, his back pressing against the cool bark. A couple of small bugs land on his tail, but he doesn’t mind. They’re kinda cute. </p><p> </p><p>The leaves sway above him in mesmerizing patterns. The sunlight flickers in and out of view, and he can feel the warmth dance across his scales. A bird flutters onto one of the thin branches high above him, and it looks down at him with curious, dark eyes. The red covering its chest is striking. Jason makes a mental note to find out what kind of bird it is later. </p><p> </p><p>Once the bird flies away, Jason declares his little break over. He studies the surrounding branches. Some of them look like they could break under his weight - he doesn’t want to go the way of the Bruce. </p><p> </p><p>There’s one next to him that’s thick and strong looking, and he’s pretty sure it’s one of the branches that goes over the water. </p><p> </p><p>Jason’s lips quirk as he gets an idea. If the branch stretches out far enough, he could simply roll off and into the ocean. He’s always wanted to know what falling from high up feels like. Bruce once described it as an exhilarating sensation. </p><p> </p><p>Mind made up, Jason rolls onto his stomach and pulls himself up onto the branch. It’s wide, but it doesn’t have the same broadness as the trunk, so it takes a lot of concentration and minute changes to his weight to stay on it. Jason inches forward bit by bit, slowly but surely. </p><p> </p><p>Before long, he’s as far as he can go without risking falling. </p><p> </p><p>The view is <em> breathtaking. </em></p><p> </p><p>Glittering blue stretches for as far as Jason can see. Across the bay, the research center and the buildings surrounding it stand proud. Behind those, and higher on the hills, there’s a larger building that - if Jason remembers correctly - is Bruce’s den. <em> House, </em> he called it. </p><p> </p><p>Jason has never seen this much dry land with his own two eyes. There are mountains reaching for the clouds, trees taller than any of the ones around the bay, and a thin gray strip that he’s pretty sure is a <em> road </em> . There are little blips of color moving along it, which must be <em> cars </em>, and, and - it’s so fucking cool. He grins and pushes himself up on his hands to see better.</p><p> </p><p>There’s so much of it. He can’t see Gotham city, but it’s probably behind him. Still, this is incredible. Jason can’t believe he’s never tried this before. He wonders if this is what the red and brown bird sees every day, and he can’t help envying it. </p><p> </p><p>Flying seems so much better than swimming, sometimes.</p><p> </p><p>To go wherever in the world, see whatever he wants to see, with no limits...it’s his biggest dream.</p><p> </p><p>If Jason asks, maybe Bruce can find a way to show him another view like this. They can fill something with water and take him up to a mountain. Yeah, that could work! Bruce would totally be on board with that! It’s not as good as flying or having legs of his own, but Jason thinks that could ease some of the longing in his chest. </p><p> </p><p>He nods to himself, and decides that he’s spent long enough in the tree. He wants to ask Bruce as soon as possible. Jason leans over the branch to gauge if he’ll need to go further out to drop into the water. He looks down, down, and -</p><p> </p><p>Oh...shit. <em> Fuck. </em></p><p> </p><p>Jason isn’t sure how long he spent climbing, but the tide has washed out. Like, <em> out </em>out. Like, out to the point where the only thing between Jason and a very rocky, splatty death is open air. </p><p> </p><p><em> “Oh, no, oh no, no no, </em>” Jason clicks, holding tight to the branch. It’s fine, this will be totally okay, he just needs to inch backwards, and - he shrieks as starts to tip over the side. He scrambles to right himself, his claws catching on the bark, and wraps his arms around the branch. </p><p> </p><p>Okay, that went badly. But maybe if he goes slower...he hisses as he feels a few soft scales partially tear off. Not backwards, then. </p><p> </p><p>There’s no other way down.</p><p> </p><p>Jason is stranded.</p><p> </p><p>It’s a terrifying realization that has his chest heaving with panicked breaths, and he digs his claws into the bark until it hurts. He’s stuck high in a tree, with no water, and no one knows he’s here.</p><p> </p><p>He’s going to dry out. Or get eaten by birds, or he’s gonna be <em> found </em> . Jason might be found by humans that aren’t him, and he’s gonna be taken from the sea <em> forever </em>. He might never touch the ocean again.</p><p> </p><p>No, no. He needs to calm down. The trees are hiding him from any birds that might try to eat him. No human would think to look for a lone mer in a <em> tree </em>of all things, should they even be in the area. Bruce said that the entire bay, including its coast, is private property - meaning untrustworthy people aren’t allowed. Hopefully.</p><p> </p><p><em> Bruce. </em> He’ll come for Jason as soon as he realizes that Jason hasn’t checked in. </p><p> </p><p>Jason just needs to call, and Bruce will hear him.</p><p> </p><p>He shifts uncomfortably on the branch - he’s already drying out - and clears his throat. He really doesn’t like calling for help - it’s embarrassing, really. He’s a stripling now, and he can take care of himself. Well, he’s always been able to, but then again, he’s never been stuck in a tree before. Desperate times call for desperate measures.</p><p> </p><p>Jason lets out a steady, high pitched cry that pierces the air. It’s an instinctive sound, but he hates how young he sounds. Sure, he’s only twelve, but why can’t his voice get <em> deeper </em> already? He sounds like he’s <em> nine </em>. </p><p> </p><p>Underwater, the cry would carry much farther than it  is right now, in open air. It would travel all the way across the bay to the research center. Up in the tree, Jason isn’t sure if it’ll get half as far. </p><p> </p><p>The minutes drag on, and the space between each cry for help gets longer and longer. Though the leaves are keeping Jason from baking in his own skin, his scales are completely dry. It isn’t the greatest feeling. The bark digs into him, making him shift every few seconds to relieve some of the discomfort.</p><p> </p><p>This. Sucks. </p><p> </p><p>Jason isn’t in any real danger, he knows that now that the panic has faded. The tide will come in by nightfall, if not sooner, and he’s safe from predators and the sun. That doesn’t stop him from being bitter about it. All he wanted was to climb a tree, and now he’s been stuck for hours. He blames Clark.</p><p> </p><p>“Mehhhh,” Jason groans, a token attempt at yet another cry for help. “Mooooh. Fuck.”</p><p> </p><p>He’s also bored out of his mind. </p><p> </p><p>The tree’s shadow has rotated so that he can see it under him. The tide is slowly creeping back in over the rocks, too. Jason should only have a couple hours left to wait. Still, in the meantime he has nothing to do but wait. He tired quickly of peeling bark, and trying to count the red cars on the far off road gave him a headache. </p><p> </p><p>Jason sighs and flicks the end of his tail. At least he’s found his balance, so he doesn’t have to worry about falling. Taking a nap might make the time pass faster. The alternative is staring listlessly across the bay at home. A nap sounds <em> fantastic.  </em></p><p> </p><p>Before he resigns himself to the long wait until the tide comes in enough, Jason cries out one last time. It echoes in the stillness, and he lets it taper off. There isn’t an answer, not that he expected one. Bruce is probably helping Barbara dissect fish, or something.</p><p> </p><p>“Jason?”</p><p> </p><p>Or he’s close by.</p><p> </p><p>Jason turns his face towards the sound of Bruce’s voice and raises an eyebrow. His ears prick towards the sound of brush being moved as his dad searches. It took Bruce long enough to get here.</p><p> </p><p>“Jay, lad, where are you?”</p><p> </p><p>Jason rolls his eyes and chirps once. The rustling stops for a moment before picking up with more fervor, this time heading straight towards him. He props his face up on his hand and waits, ignoring the rough branch against his elbow in favor of being dramatic.</p><p> </p><p>“Jason, what are you doing out here...” Bruce trails off as he steps out of the undergrowth and into the little clearing the tree is in. His brow furrows as he scans the ground. “Jason?”</p><p> </p><p>“Up, here, old man,” Jason calls. </p><p> </p><p>Bruce looks up and his eyes widen when they find Jason. He hurries over, gasping, “What the hell are you doing up there? <em> How </em>did you get up there?”</p><p> </p><p>Jason shrugs. “I climbed. Was going to jump from here to the water, but the tide went out.”</p><p> </p><p>“Why didn’t you...you’re stuck, aren’t you.”</p><p> </p><p>“No,” Jason says defensively. He scratches at a leaf and scowls, his cheeks burning. “Maybe.”</p><p> </p><p>Bruce snorts, and Jason throws a chunk of bark at him with a hiss.</p><p> </p><p>“Sorry, sorry,” Bruce says, not sorry at all. “Did Clark’s stories inspire you?”</p><p> </p><p>Jason’s scowl deepens, and he snaps, “are you gonna help me down, or what?”</p><p> </p><p>Bruce shakes his head, smiling, as he approaches the tree. He scales it in seconds - what a fucking show off. It took him all of three strides to get to the bowl of the trunk.</p><p> </p><p>Jason has to crane his neck to watch Bruce get onto the branch. It shudders under his weight, and Jason trills nervously. Bruce places a steadying hand on his tail and frowns. </p><p> </p><p>“You’re bone dry,” Bruce says. “How long have you been out of the water?”</p><p> </p><p>“A while, I guess.”</p><p> </p><p>Having someone touch Jason’s scales while they’re dry is an odd sensation, to say the least. It isn’t uncomfortable, but it isn’t pleasant, either. Just...weird.</p><p> </p><p>“Do you think you can turn around?” Bruce asks.</p><p> </p><p>Jason shakes his head. “I’ll fall. Don’t drag me!” he adds quickly as Bruce starts to get a firmer grip on the end of his tail. “The bark will take my scales off.”</p><p> </p><p>Bruce nods and lets go, his face stony as he thinks. He looks down the trunk, then back at Jason, and huffs.</p><p> </p><p>“I can wait until the tide comes back in,” Jason offers, though his heart sinks at the prospect.</p><p> </p><p>“It won’t rise for a while yet, and I am not leaving you here.” Bruce shifts back a few steps and asks, “Do you think you can inchworm it?”</p><p> </p><p>“Can I <em> what?” </em></p><p> </p><p>“Lift yourself up and move backwards at the same time. Like an inchworm.”</p><p> </p><p>Okay, Jason is looking up what the fuck an inchworm is when they get home. </p><p> </p><p>“Once you get close enough, I can pick you up,” Bruce continues.</p><p> </p><p><em> “That’s such a stupid idea, </em>” Jason clicks under his breath, then sighs. “I’ll try. Don’t let me fall.”</p><p> </p><p>“Never,” Bruce says. He holds his hands out to the sides of Jason’s tail, ready to right him if he loses his balance. </p><p> </p><p>Safety net in place, Jason slowly lifts his midsection so that his skin and soft scales are off of the branch, pushes himself back a little, and lays back down. To his surprise, he’s moved a few inches towards Bruce. He didn’t even lose any more scales.</p><p> </p><p>“Exactly like that,” Bruce encourages.</p><p> </p><p>Jason continues to shimmy backwards, though he winces every so often when sharp pieces of bark or twigs dig into him. It’s slow going, but it’s going. Bruce murmurs assurances the whole time. </p><p> </p><p>Jason is so focused that he doesn’t realize he’s close enough to be grabbed until Bruce’s arms slip around his waist and lift him. He’s pulled away from the dumb bark and held against his dad’s chest as Bruce moves away from the branch. </p><p> </p><p>It takes some maneuvering, but Bruce manages to shift Jason onto his back. Jason wraps his arms around Bruce’s neck, and his tail around Bruce’s waist, and then <em> finally </em>relaxes. He didn’t even realize how tense he’s been. </p><p> </p><p>“You doing okay, Jaylad?” Bruce asks.</p><p> </p><p>Jason nods, the fabric of Bruce’s shirt soft against his cheek. “M’ ready to go home.”</p><p> </p><p>Bruce starts descending the tree, half walking, half sliding. “You and me both, kiddo. I’ve been looking for you for hours - you nearly gave me a heart attack when I realized you were stuck on land.”</p><p> </p><p>“Sorry,” Jason mumbles. He sighs and lets his eyes flutter shut - now that he’s safe, the exhaustion is setting in. He’s ready for a nap, and for a long soak. His sin feels tight from dehydration. “I’ll climb a different tree next time.”</p><p> </p><p>Bruce laughs, and it’s a soothing rumble. “I don’t suppose I can talk you out of it?”</p><p> </p><p>“The view is too worth it.”</p><p> </p><p>“Fair enough. Maybe we can drive you up somewhere so that you can see the whole coast.”</p><p> </p><p>“I’d like that,” Jason yawns. Apparently Bruce reads minds now, not that Jason minds - it makes his job easier. <em> “Thanks, dad.” </em></p><p> </p><p>Bruce reaches up and gently squeezes his arm. “Get some rest, Jase. I’ll wake you when we get to the water.”</p><p> </p><p>Jason can’t say no to that. He yawns one last time and lets sleep take him, trusting Bruce to keep him safe. </p><p> </p><p> </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I speed submitted this because my laptop is dying and I don't want to go get the charger lmao</p><p>Drop me into a lake @ <a href="https://www.tumblr.com/blog/batshit-birds">Batshit-Birds</a></p></blockquote></div></div>
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